Just so we're clear, this little adventure owes nothing to the fact the moon was unavailable and the next most remote spot the happy couple could find was Larroque. This adventure came about because I didn't book my flight in time and didn't ask for a lift, but mostly because I thought it would be fun!
'Fail to prepare, prepare to fail', someone once said, while abandoning ship. I think 'fail to prepare, prepare for adventure' is better suited to today's meander!
I sweat, when I wear a bag on my back the bag becomes sweaty. When I put the bag on my trigano floor and head off to sleep, I wake up to a bag covered in ants. Of course I'd left my clothes for today's trip neatly piled on the floor... Ants in my pants!
Having painstakingly removed every ant I could find from bag and cycling shorts I set about tucking into my complimentary breakfast. Ninety seconds later I was set up for the day having devoured a pain au chocolate and a glass of orange juice.
Owing to the lack of a charger I was down to Google's finest printed directions. All 'head south' here, 'turn right' there and 'in 500 meters take the second exit on the round about'! I'm gliding out of Soreze, the early morning air is still fresh, the motorists are polite and best of all the directions are actually making sense. Then I come to a 'passage interdit' smack bang in the middle of where I'm meant to be heading. I stop in my tracks, or in this case clearly someone else's tracks and dig out my tablet.
Go tobann, a wise woman's voice ventures authoritatively, 'continue straight, then slight left'... My Google maps doesn't need the internet to give me directions! I'm in heaven, the next twenty or so kilometers are bliss, Google can do no wrong, even when it brings me along a grass verge on the side of a river. Then almost inevitably it comes to a crushing halt as it prompts me to head down a road that literally doesn't exist. Oh and the battery is about to die.
Halfway through a five hour cycle and some educated guesses later I end up in a little village, chomping on a quiche and drowning a can of coke. It's 1 pm and I decide to be sensible and take a nap on a bench under the shade of some trees, in a vacant playground.
Falling asleep in cycling shorts, with a cycling vest on is acceptable I would say. Waking up in tight shorts, a sleeveless top, in a playground when a mother and child arrive, is uncomfortable for everyone concerned. I sit up, take a swig of my water and then casually open a bag of sweets... You're right your honor, it doesn't look good! Time to get back in the saddle.
I made a quick pit stop at a local bar to ask for directions to my final destination, I end up with a piece of paper with four village names and a couple of lefts and rights. That piece of paper got me to where I am now. In case you're wondering, I'm in the hotel, the right hotel. So next time Google, four words on a scrap of paper, yeah!
The hotel shower? Unbelievable, picture the scene.
I stopped to ask an old lady for directions to the hotel. She said she didn't know but there was a cheap hotel round the corner. I told her I had a reservation, she offered to get her van to drop me to this mystery hotel. I said I was fine and would plough on cycling, she winked and said 'you're lucky your young and muscular' and walked off delighted with her bit of candy for the day.
Now to put the feet up à la wedding Francaise!
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